Urja Mahesh Karia
If there’s one thing that people would willingly give- for FREE, that’ll be their opinions or advise. Now, the interesting question which must cross our minds is that, “Do these people really follow what they preach?” it is very easy to give advise, but to follow the same, not a cake walk. Have you ever seen a kid doing as told to him? Probably not. But, he will voluntarily do what his father always did in front of him. Many people end up following their previous generations. If we notice, “we always follow examples, never the advise.”
Though there is a difference between opinion and advise, but the way people give it to other people, its like they’re shoving something down your throat, expecting you to swallow it up, not caring if you even like the taste of that thing, needless to say that the person will throw up sooner or later. The one thing which people can do is give their suggestions, only when asked for it. No one likes to get advise, even if it is good for them.
People usually approve of things others tell them, and do as they say, because, they want to feel accepted. They want to be a part of the crowd. They want other people to like them. Why be a people pleaser when you don’t even like doing the particular thing. Being a people pleaser can be very demeaning for anyone. We start acting as per someone else’s choice and then there comes a phase in our life when we really forget what we are naturally like. There’s this another layer of personality over our real selves. Then, we keep thinking and venting over our unhappiness. We don’t understand what is wrong with us. But, how do you expect to be happy if you don’t do things as per your own choices. Our value will not decrease just because someone else cannot see what we’re worth.
It is not your mistake. People will always unknowingly pressurize you to try and fit it. And that leads to you living a life which is not yours. It is based on other people’s opinions, their choices, the ones they make for you. Don’t be trapped in the jail of this Dogma- living with the consequences of other people’s opinions for you. It is ok to live life as per your own preferences, and it is more than ok to be different. Why would you want to be like other people and follow them or their choices, when you have the privilege of being unique and live up to your own expectations. When we try and be perfect for the sake of other people, we forget that, “Imperfect is Beautiful.”
The only way of being Happy and living a life you would love to live is by not caring what other people think of you. They are a part of the crowd. Theyre just people, human beings, like you, like me and its okay, People do have judgemental thoughts, but when you stop caring about their opinion towards you, you will feel an amaizing kind of freedom, like a big weight being pulled off your shoulders, your wings of creativity will again start fluttering and YOU WILL FLY.
As Paulo Coelho, author-The Alchemist said, “If someone isn’t what others want them to be, the others become angry. Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own.”
(Author may be reached at oorjakaria@gmail.com)
I dont find it hard to ignore people, doing it since my oblivion. But it lets the advisors think that they are not being paid attention, therefore to modify the strategy – Listen what they want to say -> And then Ignore. Battle of wits